Journal Entry 008: Moving with Ease
Feb 12th, 2025
6:54PM
Austin, TX
Are we running towards or away from something good?
Consider this mini short film a soft launch of my (temporary) move away from LA.
SURPRISE.
It's my favorite place in the world. It’s home. And, man, this might be one of the heavier relocations of my life (I’ve moved seven times since 2020, this one’s different).
Over the past three years in particular: A foundation, a sense of place and belonging - things I never thought I would identify in a place - I found living and working in Los Angeles.
I love it more than any other place I’ve visited across the globe…
In the interest of full transparency, though,
I haven't had paid work as a director in the city in six months.
(this is despite directing two major label documentaries, a few music videos shot coast-to-coast, a whole month on a FEATURE FILM SET, etc… the general benchmarks of what would most call a successful year… by no means is this intended to be a plea for pity - but for general context, the work is hard to come by no matter how seasoned one may be.)
There’s an aspect of these industries as a filmmaker and freelancer - especially in LA - where you don't really talk about things like that because, at least I think, there's there's a fear that people will then conflate your lack of work with a lack of talent or capability… And a lot of the time that’s unfortunately how the business actually operates. I’ve been fortunate enough to support myself as a freelance director since I dropped out of film school in 2019, but I’d be lying if times weren’t starting to feel dire from a numbers and longevity perspective. In most of my filmmaking community back home, that seems to be a shared sentiment. I've watched a few recent opportunities disintegrate before my very eyes because I didn't have a following, or this, or that. It’s been difficult to not veer pessimistic that anybody truly sees what I see in myself and my work.
Conversely, I'm at a place where I am the most confident I've ever felt in my work. No outside approval necessary.
So where does that leave us?
I'm making the best stuff that I've ever made - it’s authentic and me. I know and believe I’m one of the best directors in the game and I'm only getting better. The reality of the situation is the resources and reserves are spreading thin… but we’re all-in.
The last thing I want is to feel like I've failed in LA, develop any sort of bad taste in my mouth about my home because of a washed industry’s shortcomings. I’ve grown and bonded and gone through early adulthood in the city - wins, losses, the fires recently, everything. Real coming of age moments. Maybe that’s why I moved. It’s seen me defeated, but it can’t see me fail.
So, here we are.
I'm using these next months to invest entirely in my personal work for the first time, cause I feel like, man - what other option is there?
And it’s what feels right. And it’s fulfilling.
There's a sense of entitlement I feel towards “making it”, because I know I'm good enough.
(I’ll definitely look at this sentence in a few years and think, “What a naive and needlessly hungry young boy! Also figure out the mustache situation. Shave it off or leave it.”)
It’s never owed or deserved, but I’m earning it- whatever “it” ends up being.
These shorts are fun because I get to craft reality exactly as I imagine it. Everything around us feels so uncertain, and I’m finding this personal work is where I can find some absolute certainty. It’s probably the most direct look inside my mind possible.
The music, the mannerisms, the words, the pacing, the edits, the colors, the humor, the emotion, the distractions…
It’s pure JT.
And who would’ve thought: moving away from everything you know is kind of isolating. Talking with clone JT has been kind of therapeutic.
So many friends seem to enjoy the recent work and that’s all the validation one could really ask for. Thank you to Bob, especially, who gave me such thoughtful feedback and sincere encouragement on these shorts before they were released. Thank you for believing in me.
I'm confident, scared, frustrated, happy, focused, and I think that's a beacon signaling radical change. And that's usually a good thing.
-JT
Here’s the accompanying playlist, as per usual. Music that describes every possible feeling during this recent period.
How I’m moving the next few months.
